Ratcheting up his efforts to win the attention of world powers, North Korean dictator Kim Jong-Il had his tongue and other body-parts pierced, sources said, after a late-night partying binge in which he also wrecked his family's SUV.
Intelligence sources said Kim's bad behavior has increased since a Fourth of July rocket test last week failed to win as much attention as the World Cup soccer matches and the death of former Enron CEO Ken Lay.
"Who do you have to [expletive] to get a full day of coverage on CNN these days," Kim was quoted as saying in an interview with a Pyongyang radio station.
The White House declined to comment on Kim's latest antics. "We'll get around to studying that, just as soon as we finish that upcoming study on climate change," said spokesman Tony Snow, referring to a report that is due in late 2007.
A further enraged Kim Jong-Il then left a five-pound bag of maraijuana in his home just as reporters were visiting and got his girlffriend pregnant.
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