Saturday, December 06, 2008

Bush Names Gardener, Cable Guy To His Transition Team

Preparing for civilian life, President George W. Bush today named Lawrence J. Zuberik of Verizon FIOS in Amarillo, Tex., as his official cable provider, and Lorenzo B. Castillo as his landscaper.
"Given his wide range of industry experience, I'm confident Larry Zuberik has the know-how to make sure that Laura and I, and the girls when they come over, will have the fullest possible range of cable channels as well as a full line of pay-per-view options, at a reasonable rate," said the president at a press conference. "This is very important when you're trying to stretch a presidential pension and social security to cover all the bases.
"And given the fine work Lorenzo Castillo did as a hand on my Crawford ranch, I have every confidence he'll do a fine job in his new responsibility as landscaper at our new home. If confirmed by the Senate, I believe they'll meet or exceed every expectation."
When reminded that neither employee needed confirmation, the president added "Well then that just gives them more time to get right down to brass tacks, doesn't it?"
Later in the week the president was expected to name a housekeeper, a bottled spring water supplier and a contractor to work on an extension behind the garage.

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